NicaraguAWESOME

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

I've been wanting to write for such a long time. But every time I try to type up a new post, I'm never quite sure what to say because there's just SO much to say. So I've decided to just share what I wrote in my journal while I was in Nicaragua. After coming home on the 11th, I got back on an airplane and headed for Paris with my family. It was all very good and pleasant to be with the fam, but I couldn't help but feel something like a fish out of water; from serving little kids in a 3rd world country to being plopped on a beach along the Mediterranean coast. I was definitely going through some Nicaragua withdrawal and still sort of am. The Lord showed me so many things and I want to be able to apply all those things to life in Maryland, but I'm unsure of what the next step is. So I think going through these old journal entries will help with that.

DAY 1

WE...ARE IN....NICARAGUA YO. Driving through the streets of Bluefields, I looked at every single person we passed by. The people here are beautiful. Not to sound like a weirdo, but they are good looking people. The jungle slum combination reminds me of Thailand, which is probably why I wasn't as shocked as I thought I would be. I've experienced this sort of poverty before; tin-roofed shacks no bigger than my bedroom, lined up one after the other, little children walking around by themselves, and stray dogs scavenging for food at every street corner. I was feeling pretty poopy the whole trip over, which made it sort of difficult to absorb everything I was hearing/seeing. But after a good ol' pepto-bismol chewable, a delicious chicken dinner, worship and a message...I'm feeling much better.

Cole, one of the OrphaNetwork interns leading us, gave a really encouraging talk and asked us these questions: how far are you willing to go to see Jesus and how are you going to help your teammates see Jesus? You may see a little Nicaraguan kid and feel moved to go up to him/her, but at the same time doubt your ability to reach out and love this kid. Matthew 14: When Jesus walks on water and Peter tells Jesus to call out for him. Peter takes a step out of the boat, starts freaking out and sinking...but Jesus comes and saves him. Jesus is going to call out to us this week and He's going to save us when we start feeling in over our heads. But I can't doubt His ability to work and love through me, or I'll freaking sink. I pray that the Lord would show me how to love in ways other than through words. I won't deny that I'm often afraid to jump out of the boat, but I pray GOD would give me the boldness and courage I need to love like Him. This whole time, I've been telling myself that the reason for this mission is to share the love of Christ. It's so much more than just love. It's showing compassion: suffering alongside these kids. Sharing in their pain. Compassions is certainly rooted in love because when you love someone, you're willing to suffer and give up something for them.

We were all totally amazed by the Verbo staff members who shared about their ministry and their current struggle to feed 120+ kids every day, Mon-Fri. Lisette, who cooks all the meals for the feeding center, was driven to tears as she told us how the church only receives enough support to feed 50 kids a day and may have to start turning down children who aren't first in line for lunch. It's easy for us to come to Bluefields and be totally heartbroken from hearing stories. But people like Lisette who have grown up and lived in this place and have experienced this kind of suffering on a daily basis...for them to be moved to tears and have such a huge heart to want to make a difference is....crazybus. I know I've come to Bluefields with a backpack full of doubt weighing me down. I'm constantly on my toes just waiting for something to go wrong when I should be praising the LORD for every single blessing He has poured on us thus far. I'm feeling rather amped after Cole's talk. I'm feeling ready to jump out of the boat and get dirty.

Cute little quotes from the day:

(after receiving gifts of travel-sized bath&bodyworks hand-sanitizer)
Adam: My scent is..... "warm vanilla sugar"
James: THAT'S WHAT YOU ARE TO ME!

(starting to doubt our Spanish proficiency)
Emily: How do you say "after"? Leche?
Rachel: Um...that means milk