Got to the Dorcas center yesterday evening. I was feeling really exhausted before leaving for CBC and actually wanted to just stay home. But after settling in, meeting Grace and Rebecca, and hearing a little more about the ministry and the kids we'd be working with, I started getting a little more excited. Today, went to the Free Church and got acquainted with Pastor Bill and the teens. Now I'm feeling crazy pumped. These teens have been doing 6-hours of VBS every day for the past 5 weeks. I can hardly get through 1 week of 3-hour days. I cannot believe how enthusiastic and excited the teens are for this week. I can't believe how mature they are and how fired up they are to serve. From what we've been told, the kids we'll be working with are here at this VBS program b/c their parents like the idea of a cheap babysitting program. Apparently, its common here for parents to send kids back to China to be raised by grandparents and when they get sent back here, they're strangers to their parents and go through a lot of emotional stress. Last week, some kid knocked in one of the glass entrance doors. Can't wait to meet him. Had a hard time focusing on the morning's message because I was busy thinking about plans for worship and crafts and whatnot, but Sunday school with Pastor Bill was good. I shared about something that Adam shared with the team in Nicaragua: why is it so much harder to see God in our normal day to day lives than it is in Nicaragua? How do we go about living for 'things above" and "not of this earth"? We need to adjust to God's plans. To give up our own agenda. Pray that God would reveal when He opens doors. Then pray for courage to overcome your reservations and fear to take those opportunities. Met with the teens and asked them for help with worship. They were more than willing to offer song ideas and I pretty much let them choose what songs they enjoyed learning with the kids: all Lincoln Brewster. Love the Lord, Majestic, and All to You. I'm excited.
DAY 1 VBS
Woke up bright and early this morning at 6:30, ate breakfast, and headed over to the church. The first 20 minutes there were spent trying to get the overhead projector to work for worship lyrics (+freaking out). Right when the kids march into the sanctuary, Lauren is able to fix 20 minutes of frustration in a blink of an eye. It was truly a miracle that we got those lyrics up and running. Ted told the message of Jesus' triumphant entry: a very loud and jumbled message for me, personally. SO MUCH BIBLE PACKED INTO 1 LESSON. But there were a number of children who seemed to be making connections from previous lessons taught. Craft time was interesting and got to bond with a few kids over gluing pieces of tissue paper onto glass jars. Candle holder transformed into ladybug habitat. The 1 kid who sticks out is Carmen. I think Pastor Bill may have told us about her on Sunday. She and her younger brother don't know much English, aren't math nerds like the other kids, don't want to participate in group activities, and get made fun of by the other kids. She was the first kid I sat next to at the beginning of the day. Right when she sat down next to me, I sort of sensed that she was the girl Pastor Bill had told us about. She had scars/markings along her chin-line, her hair all oily and unkempt, and she didn't seem to give any attention to what was being said. But after working with her on math and finding that she could hardly add without counting her fingers, I knew she was really different from the other kids. First off, what kind of Asian parents don't drill their kids with math? There's this one kid, Jonathan, who spends his free time in between activities reading a book on chess strategies and solving his rubics cube in 55 seconds flat. The epitome/norm of a Chinese kid. Carmen seems to really enjoy reading out loud even though it's clear she doesn't know many English words. I heard her talking to one of the other kids enthusiastically in Mandarin. Maybe Nelson can help her out. I'm excited to see what would happen if he did.
Me, Elizabeth, and Kenny were sitting at the entrance of the Dorcas center when Elizabeth asked Rebecca Lee, "what do you do here at the center all day?" She explained how she works with a lot of Chinese immigrants, whether its immigration forms, dealing with housing issues, or interpretation. They offer advice/aid free of charge with no government subsidies and hope to find open doors to sharing the gospel. Rebecca told us that when she first knew God was calling her to missions, she wanted to at least serve in Africa or Latin America. Brooklyn, NY was not what she had in mind. Yet God made it abundantly clear to her that He wanted her here. Goes along with what me and Elizabeth have been planning for our devotion tomorrow morning: When we're resistant to God's plans for us or refuse to move when He makes it clear where we should be going or what we should be doing, He makes it ABUNDANTLY clear which way we are to go. It might not be what we want and it's going to be hard to give up our own plans for His, but in the end it's clear that "God's way is the best". Rebecca said to go where God is at work. I think He's telling me exactly where He wants me to go but I'm still resistant. Lord, make it abundantly clear this week on this mountaintop where I need to go.
VBS DAY 3
Exhausted. Led bible story this morning: Jesus gets arrested. Had a little skit for the kids to act out, which was semi-successful. At least some of the kids got to get out of their seats. Brian was a 1 show Judas/angry mob/dude who gets his ear cut off. Craft time was beyond tedious. Who knew teaching kiddie crafts could be so much work. MISS BECKY MISS BECKY MISS BECKY. Running back and forth between kids, teaching them how to thread their gimp through beads. Of course, the one kid who surprises me the most during crafts is Brian Chiu, who sits quietly pulling together a frog without asking a single question or disrupting any of the other kids. Possibly the only child that day who did not ask for any help whatsoever. During free time, me and Kevin played bball: I beat him in HORSES and he beat me in around the world. Math and English go pretty well. Another brain teaser with pies and fractions and Bible verse paraphrasing. We end the day with Alex rushing us out of the building without doing debriefing with the teens. I get slightly upset. He then goes on to skip our entire team debriefing. So me/ted/anna/bethanie/nelson/jessie/Rebecca sat down at the dinner table and had our own little sharing time of testimonies. I shared about my current career path dilemma and how much the Lord has shown me this past year and this entire summer. How much I love serving Him. How much I love serving the kids. I began to tear up. I think because I know the Lord has given me a passion and a gift to serve kids, yet I'm resistant to take a step further in that direction because my parents want me to go another. Or perhaps that's not true. We then prayed for the kids around the table and Rebecca prayed for me, which really touched me for some reason. Just taking the time to pray with us after a really really long day. Walked through Lief Ericson park and Chinatown with Bethanie and had a really good talk. She's like the little sister I never had.
LAST DAY GAH
Stayed up til 3am making thank you cards for Grace/Rebecca/helpers. Thus, I had no time/brain power to write a journal entry for Day 4. From what I remember, craft time was a blast with the 3rd/4th graders. We made origami crosses: challenging enough to take up 45 minutes, easy enough for everyone to have a reasonable finished product. Craft time with the older kids was not as smooth-sailing. Tried to teach them how to make hexagonal spheres, but I couldn't even finish mine. My low of the day: falling on my butt while teaching math and getting my hair ripped out on the way down. A bunch of boys rushed to my aid to ask if I was alright. Their concern for my retardation was touching. Puppet show in the morning was the best of all the days. At the very end, our puppet wall fell over and the kids loved it. Got back to the Dorcas Center, ate a quick dinner of ox tails and left for the Brooklyn Bridge with Eddy and Cacket? Stopped off in Chinatown first, picked up some gifts for the teen helpers and some shaved ice from ui ui (pudding and redbean ftw). Lost Nelson in Chinatown. It seemed as if this entire trip we were always asking, "Where's Nelson?" I love Nelson. He always looks so content, he laughs when I burp, he doesn't mind our silliness, and watching him sit next to Leon reading a book about Exorcism on a bench made my day. Walking across the Brooklyn Bridge was awesome. I was amazed at how beautiful this city looks from a distance.
Brian Chiu: full of anger this one. He looks like a devil-child from the outside and can act like one at times. But he amazes me every time he comes up just to talk. He's not after anything, he just simply wants to gain my approval as a friend. He's got a sweet side to him.
Cindy: my cling-buddy this week. Girl likes to talk about everything and anything. Always calling me over to eat lunch with her or to follow her around during gym time. I regret brushing her aside to play bball vs. Kevin. She's called me every night to ask when I'll be on AIM.
Last day, always a sad one. Craft time was crucifixion Jesus cookies: graham crackers, peanut butter, chocolate chips, maple syrup, and coconut. Took the little ones 30 minutes to make a single cookie. I love how all the helpers always want to make whatever the little ones are making. It's as much fun for them to follow along. The older kids did cookies, origami balls, and gospel bracelets. During math today, had our first little math-related meltdown when John told some kid that he didn't show his work and that guessing answers isn't the right way to do it. John takes his math seriously. He even skipped the water fight to figure out the brain teaser. This is the same kid who spends his free time solving rubik's cubes and reading about chess strategies. I am going to the miss the teens so much. I kept telling them, "I can't believe you guys have done this for 5-6 weeks straight". Yesterday, I was folding and cutting paper for origami when I noticed Joy filling the kids' cups with water. It's little details like that that I had taken for granted. Some of the helpers just spend a majority of their day cleaning up after the kids, preparing snacks/lunch, disciplining, escorting kids to the bathroom, and cleaning up after us. Sounds like it sucks. But they still post facebook status' like "had a ton of fun today!"
You know what's scary? I'm back home now. But I think this trip to NY really confirmed something for me: I have a gift with kids. It's as if the Lord is pointing me in this direction. After 5 months of preparation and fundraising for Nicaragua, I returned feeling uneasy because I couldn't feel that 'transformation' that we talked about so much through our team verse. Had the Lord really transformed my heart and mind? I think I was very disappointed when I got home and felt as if nothing had changed and that I did not have any more direction than I did before the trip. But I feel different after NY. There were times when we were just walking through Brooklyn back to the Dorcas Center and everything just seemed so perfectly and ridiculously surreal and i would think, "is this real life? Is this for real? Is this really happening?" I would just be in awe of everything I had experienced that day. God's way is the best way. May i never forget that. Lord, show me your way and may I not hesitate when you call me. Give me patience and discernment as you unfold your will to me.
